Sorry guys, but three half-wits don't make a whole one either.
Francis Maude, believe it or not, is a qualified lawyer and QC! Cripes, they let anyone in these days! Mind you he only spent six years practising as a lawyer before going into politics full-time, following in his Dad's footsteps, so perhaps we're twigging something there. Either he wasn't much good as a lawyer or he was only doing it to acquire some independent credibility as a prospective Tory candidate.
Any road up, in an effort to divert attention from the stink created by Mr Cruddas, Cameron (or one of his teen-aged advisers) thought he would dive in and stir up some trouble around the current dispute between the tanker drivers and their various employers about minimum pay and conditions. He figured that as it is the Unite trade union that is involved and they support the Labour Party, he was on to a winner and could cause massive embarrassment to Ed Milliband. But in his typically half-baked way he failed to figure out that Unite was nowhere near calling a strike - they had merely balloted their members on whether or not to take industrial action, as required by law. And even if a strike were to be called there has to be seven days notice. Talks got going today through ACAS.
For one reason or another, Francis Maude was nominated as the chump to take forward the plan for alarm and despondency. Not the Secretary of State for Energy, or the Secretary of State for Transport. Not even the Business Secretary. But Maude, the Cabinet Secretary. Funny that.
Well, as we've seen the whole thing was entirely bogus - there has been no strike but nonetheless thousands of dimwits have been panicked into queueing up for petrol and to keep their tanks topped up, thereby causing the fuel shortage they were all afraid of. Maude took it the extra mile with his stupid advice about keeping a jerry can in the garage. Duh! Even the Tory-friendly media have figured it out and suggested that the whole episode was manufactured as a distraction.
What's really depressing about it is that so many people allowed themselves to be conned into panic buying fuel. Perhaps this explains how it is that half-wits like Maude and Cameron mange to get elected to office in the first place.