NYJO Nearly Broke

Alarming news via the Evening Standard. The National Youth Jazz Orchestra (NYJO) needs to raise £105K by April, or face financial ruin. This is apparently part of the knock-on effect from the cancellation of the annual National Association of Youth Orchestras festival, which has a shortfall of £50K. Winding up NYJO would be a great tragedy as it provides a tremendous training ground for young musicians. To help them out you could book them to play at your wedding, bar mitzvah or whatever. Or if you are a rich businessman you could sponsor them. If you are an employee of Goldman Sachs you could just give them a bit of your bonus.
Further Thought: £100K is 1% of the amount being spent on the war in Afghanistan per day. Maybe we can persuade Her Majesty's Government to divert some funds!

Dancin' Fool

(via Kill Ugly Radio )
This has to be one of the best ever cover versions of a Frank Zappa song.

Schadenfreude

It seems appropriate somehow that the Germans have a special word, schadenfreude,  describing the pleasure we take in the misfortune of others. Not that the Germans are the only people who enjoy such things. And of course we enjoy even more the misfortunes of those who usually get everything right and have a high opinion of themselves.

Manchester City (and others) will be cackling over Alex Ferguson's current unease at the lack of goals his team are scoring whilst Carlos Tevez is knocking them in like billyo for Manchester City - 15 goals so far this season, equalling his total for the whole of last season. Sir Alex reckoned he wasn't worth the £25 million asking price. Ronaldo, whom Sir Alex presumably thought was worth the £80 milliion Real Madrid paid for him, meanwhile has scored 13 goals. And Dimitar Berbatov whom Sir Alex bought for £23.4 million has scored 6. Presumably, Sir Alex blames the refereee.

Clothing Fibre Re-alignment Sitrep Update

I am pleased to announce that I have finished the ironing, a process whereby heat and water loosen the long-chain molecular bonds within polymer fibres thus allowing them to be straightened by the application of pressure. And, as if by magic, they retain their shape as they cool. Re-orientating the fibres has no practical value as far as I can tell but it gives a more aesthetically pleasing outcome if applied after washing.

Any Road Up

The Larnaca Municipality has been digging up the roads in the town centre for some time now. It seems like about 103 years and, typically for Cyprus, they never seem to finish. All the work is carried out by the same contractors Iacovou Brothers, whom I suspect must be related in some way to the Mayor and/or officials in the contracts department. Here's just some of the works under way in 2009. As I often say about Cyprus: "It'll be nice when it's finished..."

Dale Winton in Credibility Shortfall

I generally listen to Pick of the Pops on BBC Radio 2, hosted by the estimable Dale Winton. This week he played stuff from the charts of 1965, including 'Little Red Rooster' by The Rolling Stones - a splendid recording. However, Dale went on to refer to this as a Sam Cooke song. Ahem - enny fule no that it was written by Willie Dixon and definitively recorded by Howlin' Wolf. Mr Cooke covered it the year before the Stones; they referred back to Messrs Wolf and Dixon rather than Mr Cooke's more 'soulified' version. So, Dale, despite your entertaining orange skin and camp delivery, I'm afraid you have just lost all credibility as far as I am concerned. This just won't do.

Viva Ukulele!

Three cheers for the English Martyrs school in Litherland, Liverpool which now has its own Ukulele Orchestra. I understand Year 4 will be learning a new chord very soon. (I have no information on who the mysterious 'Mr Dinsdale', credited with these videos, might be.)

The ukulele can only bring happiness wherever and whenever it appears. Teaching children how to play will undoubtedly make the world a better place, leading to peace and prosperity for all. The ukulele will facilitate a proactive recontextualization of the in-school experience to drive a tringulation of  real-world objectives - Life, the Universe and Everything -  thereby achieving a convergence of meta-cognitive functionalities and competencies unleashing synergistic child-centred real-time development. This is the way forward and I urge all educationalists to brush aside their obsessions with SATS, league tables, curricula, and assessment-driven pedagoguish paradigms and to envision one simple, holistic outcome-based mission statement: To Play the Ukulele!

Elvis Quacks

You like Elvis and you take a bath from time to time. What you need is an Elvis Rubber Duck!

As far as I know, it neither sings nor quacks. But maybe you can do your own singing in the bath. Uh huh huh, uh huh huh. Oh yeah, I'm all quacked up.

Epiphany

Typical. You wait all this time for A Wise Man and three turn up at once.

Anyone Can Change Their Mind

As reported in The Independent:

David Cameron insisted today that the Tories were "the party of the NHS" as he claimed that health service spending was safe only with them. Mr Cameron said the first section of the Tories' manifesto confirmed the party's commitment to protecting the NHS budget in real terms. "It was our number one priority four years ago when I became leader of the Conservative Party - and has remained so ever since," he said. "It's only three letters long but in it lies the hopes of millions in our country - the NHS.

Somewhat of a contrast to the Conservative Party's attitude towards the foundation of the NHS, back in 1946, as described by Patricia Hewitt MP in a speech to the Fabian Society:

"The Tories opposed his (Aneurin Bevan, the Labour Health Secretary) plan tooth and nail. The Tories' health spokesperson Henry Willink warned the House of Commons that the NHS 'will destroy so much in this country that we value'. The Tories voted against it in Parliament no fewer than 51 times. Once might be a miscalculation, but 51 shows a degree of determination!"

Now That I Have Humility I Have Everything

The sayings of the cranially endowed Cristiano Ronaldo: 

"It's true lots of people hate me but there are even more who love me and who support me. I feel bad only when I play badly. Fortunately that happens rarely."

"It is the best I have scored. It was a fantastic strike and I can't wait to see it again on DVD."

"The great players cost a lot of money, and if you want them you have to pay it. I'm happy to be the most expensive player in the world."

"I'm going to win the Ballon d'Or back, this year or next. I have an ambition to become the best player in history."

It was a lively match for Cristiano: he missed a penalty, failed to celebrate when Benzema netted the rebound, scored another himself and finally ended up being dismissed towards the end of the encounter (second yellow card for kicking Ortiz).  Cristiano stated, "I am a human being, and I can also make mistakes. It was an instinctive reaction, and I have already apologized to my team-mates. I am a perfectionist, but the good thing is that Karim scored."

Why Am I Not Surprised?

The judge in the trial of the Blackwater employees who shot 17 Iraqis has dismissed all charges against the defendants on the grounds that they had been told that what they said in their initial interviews would not be used against them, but this has nevertheless been included in the prosecution's evidence. Notwithstanding that one of the defendants pleaded guilty and was to testify against his former colleagues, and that there are other witnesses prepared to give similar evidence. So, the Blackwater guys are guilty but they get off on a technicality. Another example of 'the Law' not providing justice, which will lead to disillusionment and to other people taking the law into their own hands. And it won't hurt Al Qaeda's  recruitment activities.

Elvis Lives

This week marks the date when Elvis Presley would have been 75 had he not slowly committed suicide in Las Vegas. There will be a flurry of 'specials' on TV & Radio and the press which I fear will tend to focus on the jumpsuit era when the cognoscenti know that he did nothing worthwhile after 1962. With maybe one or two exceptions, everything after he came out of the army was total crap with a capital K. Meanwhile, the Elvis Industry will be offering endless piles of rubbish 'collectibles' and I'm keeping an eye out for the most tacky and yecch-inducing item to appear. So far, in amongst the keychains, clocks, plates, hot water bottles and barbecue aprons, this item is in the lead. I don't know why, but the fact that it emanates from Bradford gives it that extra wha?.. quotient.

...You Caught Me Standing Alone

Not only was it New Year's Eve last night but it was also a blue moon. Defined in Wikepedia as follows:

A blue moon is a full moon that is not timed to the regular monthly pattern. Most years have twelve full moons which occur approximately monthly, but in addition to those twelve full lunar cycles, each solar calendar year contains an excess of roughly eleven days compared to the lunar year. The extra days accumulate, so that every two or three years (7 times in the 19-year Metonic Cycle), there is an extra full moon. The extra moon is called a "blue moon." Different definitions place the "extra" moon at different times. The term blue moon was coined in 1933.

See also NASA Astronomy Picture of the Day.

Blue Moon is a track on Elvis Presley's first album.
Until the arrival of Carlos Tevez, the frequency of a blue moon coincided with a goal being scored by Manchester City.

Starfleet?

This is the official logo of The Russian Federal Space Agency.











 And this is the logo of Starfleet Command.

There is a striking similarity. I think we should be told.

Dickens' Women

If you are at all interested in Charles Dickens, have a listen to Dickens' Women which was broadcast on BBC Radio 7 on Monday (it will remain available for four days). This a recording of Miriam Margolyes' one-woman show on the female characters in his books and relates them to his own personal experience of women. She provides some fascinating insights.

My first iTunes release!

Even though I'm not credited, I recorded this whole album. It is very good if I may say so myself.

Play it on Spotify

Play it on iTunes

Have a great time.

A Certain Date

March 14, 2015 9:26:53 will be of note to those who move in mathematical circles. 3/14/15 9:26:53 or 3.141592653 or pi.

Person of the Year

After much deliberation and controversy, the result is finally in.

Pick Up Your Les Paul

The electrical bits of my Epiphone Les Paul '57 Goldtop have been a tad dogy for some time so our Phil volunteered to fix it. He's acquired some Di Marzio pick ups, new potentiometers and genuine Gibson wire, new switches and input socket and re-wired the whole shebang. He's also put on a new nut. Here we see him mid-repair. I'm a bit out of practice these days, but maybe this will get me back in the groove again.

[Phil is not the tidiest worker, but he gets the job done and is available for commissions. Leave a comment and we'll get back to you!]