Monday, 8 March 2010

Keats and Chapman

Members of the cognoscenti will be fully apprised of the humourous writings of Flann O'Brien (aka Myles na Gopaleen and Brian O'Nolan). He wrote a regular column in The Irish Times which, inter alia, featured vignettes concerning two semi-intellectual reprobates named Keats and Chapman,  based around some truly awful pun or jeu sur des mots. Some are a tad obtuse but most are excrutiating. Here's a short example:
  • The poet and Chapman once visited a circus. Chapman was very impressed by an act in which lions were used. A trainer entered a cage in which were two ferocious-looking specimens, sat down unconcernedly, took out a paper, and began to read. "He's reading between the lions," Keats said.
You can buy a second-hand compendium of these scribblings at Abebooks for  a small consideration. (May I also suggest that you venture a couple of pounds on The Third Policeman, which involves a bicycle.) I should warn you, however, that once you become initiated into the Keats and Chapman mode de pensée, it won't be long before you too are inflicting similar agonie littéraire on the world. Watch this space.

Friday, 5 March 2010

Jimi Hendrix

Mr Hendrix might look a bit bored here but this is interesting as he's playing a Gibson SG. Looks like a 1964 Custom, which would set you back about £15,000 these days. The one actually played by Mr Hendrix would be considerably more.

Thursday, 4 March 2010

Now That's What I Call Lunch

Barbecued octopus,deep-fried king prawns, grey mullet, sprats, squid rings, chips and a village salad. With KEO beer.

Tuesday, 2 March 2010

Strangely Pronounced

The English language contains many words which are pronounced differently from the way in which they are spelled. For example, one might expect cough to be spelled koff, and rough to be spelled ruff. So why isn't bluff spelled blough? The same goes for English surnames which can be a tad bizarre. Here's a list of some strange pronunciations of oddly spelled names. See if you can spot the one I made up.

Spelled Pronounced
Belvoir Beever
Colquhoon Co’hoon
Cholmondeley Chumley
Featherstonehaugh Fanshaw
Geoghegan Gaygan
Marjoribanks Marchbanks
Ayscough Askew
Wriothesley Roxley
Bethune Beeton
Vacuous Twit David Cameron

Entanglification Runs Amok

You've probably heard of the Grimms fairy tale The Elves and the Shoemaker in which some elves help out a struggling shoemaker by sneaking in to his workshop overnight and making shoes for him to sell. We seem to have some similar creatures lurking around here who, rather than making us rich, however, mess the place up. We call them Maxwell's Demons*. When I set up El Presidente's computer I'm certain that I had all the wires behind the desk nice and neatly sorted out with everything going to sockets in a logical order. But look at the wires now. You'd have to be a rare talent to arrange wires like this! It would take hours of dedicated unplugging and plugging back in again to get the wires like this. We can only deduce that some unknown entity or strange force is behind it.
* The term Maxwell's Demons was coined by a physics teacher at my school, Doc Standen, who when asked how a perfect vacuum came to be in the bell jar on the lab table as he claimed, replied "Maxwell's Demons put it there." It's as good an explanation as any for something which ought only to exist as a philosophical concept but has somehow apparently come to pass.

Whatever Happened To...

The gentleman on the left is Josh, erstwhile bass player in Hanzo, a sort of jazz/funk/rock band which Josh, his brother Luke and our Phil formed while at school. They played a number of gigs locally and, most famously, at The 100 Club in Oxford Street, London where this picture was taken. They also won the competition for best young band in The Hertford Music Festival. The band split up as everyone drifted off to University or elsewhere, although they have done a couple of 'reunion' gigs since.
Josh is currently undertaking a four-year Phd course in particle physics which involves visits to the large hadron collider in Cerne. He still plays music, although more on the saxophone these days. His hair is even longer and is formed into dreadlocks. His brother Luke (guitar), having graduated in philosophy, is now the manager of trendy bar Deco in Hertford. There may or may not be a connection with Monty Python's Philosopher's Song "Renee Descartes was a drunken fart; I drink therefore I am." Ellie Lovegrove (trumpet & flugelhorn) graduated from The Royal College of Music and is now a professional musician having recently toured Europe with Seal and performed with the BBC National Orchestra of Wales, amongst others. Fi Thomas (vocals) graduated in humanites and now sings in a band with her brother Will on guitar. Ellis (saxophone) is studying architecture at Cambridge University. Chris Eldred (keyboards) is in the midst of a degree in jazz piano at Trinity College of Music, London. He is a member of the National Youth Jazz Orchestra, and leads his own trio who are playing several jazz festivals this year including Greenwich, Swanage, and the Isle of Wight. He plays in the Tom Braggins Band with our Phil, and many more. Our Phil is playing drums for Acer Maple at the Jazz Cafe in London on 2 April - he engineered their EP Early which is available for download at iTunes. Phil is about to get a proper job so he can afford a new car.

Monday, 1 March 2010

Stuff

Today I will be moaning mostly about stuff. I don't know about you boys and girls but we got a lot of it. Stuff, by which I mean things that lie around the house cluttering it up. Things that someone is keeping just in case it comes in useful; stuff they don't want to get rid of because it used to something they used. Books and magazines that they haven't read or are never going to read  but they might. Incomplete crosswords. Fifteen different kinds of shampoo and/or conditioner. Old toothbrushes. Trousers that don't fit any more that need mending but which you used to like. Jiffy bags of all shapes and sizes. Cardboard boxes that might be needed sometime, if ever anyone gets round to tidying up. Photo frames. Hand bags. Plastic food storage boxes. Coat hangers, takeaway menus, receipts and scarves. Stuff. And so on and so forth.

Sunday, 28 February 2010

Dweezil Workshop

I received an e-mail from Dweezil Zappa t'other day advertising his 'boot camp' this summer in the Catskills. The idea is that putative musicians go along and join in workshops with Dweezil and his  ZPZ  band and thereby improve their musicianly skills. I dunno if I would benefit from this or not, but it is outwith my budgetary capability in any case so, whatever, maaan. Dweezil has been touring with his Frank Zappa tribute band for a few years now and has come in for some criticism for being too meticulous in his reproduction of Frank's music; he seems to have missed the point that Frank would more often than not change stuff around for the hell of it. Dweezil has excellent, almost obsessive, technique but he doesn't have the magic (which is not his fault). Besides that, the Zappa Family Trust has alienated a lot of people by its litigious approach to other tribute bands who do mess around a bit, and to fan websites. So it's good to see Dweezil branching out and trying a new business model.
Meanwhile, if you go to zappa.com there's an amusing flash animation for the most recent posthumous CD release 'Philly 76' which is kind of an official bootleg live album. If you are new to Frank Zappa this would not be the best place to start - contact the Xorg Collective for advice. To purchase Zappa product, we recommend G & S Music rather than buying from the ZFT in America where you'll get cobbered for shipping and import taxes etc.
* Note that you could attend a similar event hosted by Medeski, Martin & Wood, a trio of adventurous jazzers who achieved fame via being in John Scofield's band.  We recommend A Go Go.

Friday, 26 February 2010

Royal Bank of Thieving Bastards

The Royal Bank of Scotland has announced losses of £3.6 billion but is nevertheless going to pay its investment bankers bonuses totalling £1.6 billion. Well, duh! Surely if they didn't pay the blighters their bonuses then the losses would only be £2 billion? Is this any way to run a battleship?
The justification is apparently that the investment bank bit of RBS made a profit, although the rest of RBS made a loss. And they claim that without the bonuses all these brilliant bankers would go elsewhere for employment. Bollocks. When the investment bank bit made a total balls-up then we all had to share the losses so why don't the bankers do likewise? And if they want to go somewhere else then goodbye, chaps!
Grrr. Harumph.

Thursday, 25 February 2010

Le Pissoir

I have recently finished reading 'Clochmerle' by Gabriel Chevalier. It's a humorous book, satirising the clash between the secular and the religious, but taking in the general hypocrisy and venality of most humans along the way. The plot centres on the erection by the Republican mayor of a public urinal located outside the church. With hilarious results.
Here's a picture of a fairly typical French pissoir, which are much less common than they used to be. Be that as it may, most gentlemen can speak about the tremendous variety of urinals that one might encounter here and there. I think the foulest, most evil-smelling one I have ever experienced is at the Selimiye Mosque in Nicosia, Cyprus. Truly awful. It is quite a challenge to hold your breath long enough to walk down the steps to the designated hole in the floor, do what you need to, do and then walk back out again without collapsing.
One of the finest urinals I have visited was at the former Bourne & Hollingsworth department store in Oxford Street, London. Very nicely maintained black and white marble, and smelling of nothing very much. Sadly Bourne & Hollingsworth are no more, although the name has been misappropriated by a pretentious wine bar in nearby Rathbone Place, frequented by dilletantes and drunkards with too much money.
Inevitably, there is a site on the interwebtubes which celebrates urinals around the world. Check it out - there is apparently a very well appointed convenience in Rothesay, Isle of Bute, within the purview of no less a person than Prince Charles himself. He's a man who knows quality when he sees it.

Wednesday, 24 February 2010

Leeds Refectory

Seeing that clip of Freddie King reminded me of the time me and our Chris saw him live in 1969 whilst Chris was a student at Leeds University. Freddie was amazing. The Students Union used to put on concerts in the refectory at Leeds and some of the best bands played there; I used to hitch down to Leeds or, if I had the money, take the train, and kip on Chris' floor. As well as Freddie King, there were Peter Green's Fleetwood Mac, Cream, The Rolling Stones, Leon Russell, Derek & The Dominoes, Paul McCartney & Wings, Led Zeppelin, Jeff Beck and many more. The Who recorded their 'Live at Leeds' album there - Chris is in the audience for that one, which I missed for some reason that escapes me now. (Buy the album - it's a cracker).
The organisation of these gigs was a bit shambolic to begin with as there was no proper stage. For the Cream gig they simply turned some tables on their sides to separate the crowd from the band. And I expect there were some comments made next day when the caretaker found that Ginger Baker's bass drums had been nailed to the parquet flooring to prevent slippage. Later on, things went a bit more professional and a temporary stage was built.
I dare say the Students Union still puts on gigs these days but just looking at their website the programme doesn't look all that exciting; Finlay Quaye and Alphabeat.

Monday, 22 February 2010

New Associate Director

Xorg Inter-Galactic is pleased to announce the appointment today of our new Associate Director for Creative Image Design and Technology, the very wonderful FabMary.
FabMary has a long and distinguished track record in scribbling, daubing and taking snaps and is thrilled at the prospect of bringing her many talents to the on-going mission we have at the Xorg Collective. Apprenticed to the great master El Plonko, and expelled from the Venice Scuola di Spruzzata Esso Dappertutto with flying colours, FabMary is a witty and apposite imaginative doyen of the chiuda in su il vostro fronte genre. We look forward to many exciting contributions.

Sunday, 21 February 2010

Green Monday

In the rest of the Eastern Orthodox world they call it 'Clean Monday' but for some unknown reason the Cypriots call it Green. Whatever, it's the first day of Lent and so they start their fast which means no meat and lots of vegetables, and its a public holiday. As you might expect though, they don't stint on the vegetables and they allow themselves to eat fish instead of meat. Another curiosity is that they are allowed olives but not olive oil. In Larnaca they have a 'town picnic' and people take their barbecues and stuff out to Tekke by the salt lake for a shindig. Ironically, there is a Muslim shrine at Tekke so who knows what they make of all these mad Christians having a knees up on their doorstep.
We went for a more low key approach and spent the day with El Presidente's cousin and husband at their Auntie's house where we indulged in a slap-up feed of the vegetarian variety. Jolly nice too. I tried for the first time a pickled edible weed called mangalos (pictured). Quite strong and fibrous, and resembles the thistles that keep invading my lawn.

A Wizard, A True Star

Fabmary and I attended Todd Rundgren's recent live performance at Hammersmith Apollo of his 1973 album A Wizard, A True Star. Absolutely fantastic!
Todd was his own support act playing heavied-up versions of Robert Johnson's songs with a line-up of two guitars, bass and drums subtly entitled 'Todd Rundgren's Johnson'. Straight up blues-rock which took a lot of the audience by surprise, but it was great to hear lots of Todd guitar even if they did sound a bit under-rehearsed. There was an over-long interval before the main event started but it was worth the wait. Todd had ten or twelve costume changes through the show, some of which were hilarious e.g. a fat suit for 'Onionhead' and his feathered outfit for 'Zen Archer', a couple of spandex leotards also featured along with an orange suit. Not forgetting the gold lame, and the astronaut suit for 'International Feel'.
Todd's band (guitar, bass, drums, two keyboards, sax/flute) were excellent and really sounded as if they were enjoying it; Todd's vocals were stupendous especially on the soul medley (I'm So Proud etc.) and the crowd went bonkers for the last half hour or so after 'Cool Jerk'. Todd had re-ordered some of the songs to give him time to change frocks in between songs. He did a lot of running about as well, considering he must be over sixty years old by now, and blasted out some flash solos on his psychedelic Gibson SG. Great!
For a full review and slideshow of Todd's performance of AWATS at the Orpheum Theatre, Los Angeles click here.

Friday, 19 February 2010

Room 101 Disney Style

Miley Cyrus demonstrates excrutiatingly what a talented artiste she is in this outdoor live performance. There's a special prize if you can bear to listen to this all the way through; maybe this is what they use at Guantanamo Bay to extract confessions from the detainees.
Kind of ironic that the show was sponsored by Toyata!

To be fair, you shouldn't really risk this kind of a gig, where you have little or no chance of hearing the monitor speakers, unless you are really good at what you do e.g. Paul McCartney or Todd Rundgren can usually sing in tune whatever is going on because they are exceptionally gifted. Whereas poor little Miley only has an extensive marketing campaign.

Thursday, 18 February 2010

Cold Tuesday

We had an interesting time in Cyprus, including the coldest Tuesday they've had for thirty years. We actually used an electric blanket. There was a lot of rain too, but we did get some sunshine at the end of the week and I enjoyed a quiet(ish) afternoon reading 'Clochmerle' by Gabriel Chevalier in the sun on the balcony.
Of course all the rain was good news for the Cypriots as it means their reservoirs are now over 50% full, so the Powers That Be have removed the water restrictions and it won't be necessary to buy water from Greece this year. Good news for Cyprus but bad news for Greece, I suppose! And there is a lot of green vegetation everywhere as a result. Here's a picture of some wild fennel growing in amongst eucalyptus trees along with edible weeds called moloshes and mangalos. (Probably spelled incorrectly).

Publicly Funded Broadcasting

The BBC has begun to put its massive archive online;12 million artefacts including 600,000 hours of television content and 350,000 hours of radio. So far, they've uploaded less than 10% but there's loads of stuff there with which to while away the hours. Everything from Neville Chamberlain to Twiggy, including John Noakes (Blue Peter) and James Burke (Tomorrow's World). There's TV and Radio programmes, documents and photo galleries. And an interview with Billy Fury!

For Sale : Abbey Road

It must take spectacular mis-management but somehow or other EMI, which owns the rights to The Beatles', Pink Floyd's, The Rolling Stones' and countless other top-selling recordings, has made a pre-tax loss of £1.7 billion. EMI need £100 million immediately to avoid being in breach of their banking arrangements with Citigroup. So there is speculation about EMI selling off some of its assets, including the Abbey Road studios - EMI do not see the studios as 'an integral part of the business'. That quote might indicate one of the reasons why the daft clucks are in trouble; I wouldn't mind betting that Abbey Road Studios is one part of the business that does actually make a profit.
The National Trust is interested but would need to run a campaign to raise the funds. However, I think Paul McCartney should buy the studios (he's got at least £400 million in the bank) and donate it to the National Trust. Any road up, if you are Paul McCartney or some other benefactor with £30 million to spare (Yoko Ono?), here's a link to  Abbey Road to show what you'd get for your money.

Saturday, 6 February 2010

Adios

El Presidente and I are away for a short break, checking up on t'builders and so forth in Cyprus. People to see, papers to sign. El Presidente also wants to making sure the right tiles and bathroom stuff is bought. My duties will be mainly to do the driving and provide reassurance; and/or look threatening if the builder or any sub-contractor gets bolshy. Otherwise I'll mostly be  reading. The weather tends to be cold-ish in Cyprus at this time of year but I'm hoping for a spot of sunshine in the mornings at least. Fabmary remains in charge here at Xorg HQ, assisted by The Boy Wonder.

Pareidolia

FabMary and I were discussing the strange phenomenon that seems to be occurring frequently these days, especially in America, when people see an image of Jesus in a bowl of spaghetti or a slice of toast or somesuch. Muslims tend to see the word 'Allah' - they are not allowed to have images of Himself. There is actually a term for this: Pareidolia. Of course, it comes from The Greek : (para), amiss, wrong) + (eidōlon), image). David Hume, the Scottish philospher described it thus:
  • There is an universal tendency among mankind to conceive all beings like themselves, and to transfer to every object, those qualities, with which they are familiarly acquainted, and of which they are intimately conscious. We find human faces in the moon, armies in the clouds; and by a natural propensity, if not corrected by experience and reflection, ascribe malice or good- will to every thing, that hurts or pleases us.
So it's a kind of wishful thinking which reveals something about you. Other examples of pareidolia might include seeing Elvis working at the dry cleaners, the Loch Ness Monster, and UFOs. Psychologists exploit this phenomenon as an analytical tool via the Rorschach ink blot test. Disney and others also use it to anthropomorphise cartoon animal characters. However, I have yet to hear of any cases of Donald Duck's visage appearing on a slice of toast. And I wonder how the Flying Spaghetti Monster feels about Jesus appearing in his bowl?

Friday, 5 February 2010

Getting One's Grey Cells Going Again

I might live to regret this but in an effort to re-energise my brain, I have signed up for another course of study with The Open University. I have already completed a BSc (Open) degree which focused on technology and social sciences, graduating in 2002, and meanwhile I've done a course on music technology which I didn't particularly enjoy - too much maths and physics! I also tried a taster course in astronomy which served mainly to show that I could never really get beyond the basics in that field. So I've gone for the Humanities this time, starting with the Arts foundation course AA100 'The Arts Past and Present'. The course gets under way this weekend. Loads of books to read!
The course includes the study of Christopher Marlowe’s play Dr Faustus. Coincidentally, the Watford Palace Theatre is touring a production of this play, sponsored by Hertfordshire County Council, so I wandered along to the performance last week at the Queen Mother Theatre in Hitchin. Hertfordshire CC's objective in sponsoring this is to provide a dramatisation that can be performed in schools as part of the A level syllabus. As a result there are severe budgetary constraints and it has to last for less than an hour. This made for a 're-imagining' of the play using only four actors, casting Dr Faustus as a woman, setting the play in present-day Cambridge University, and conflating several of the characters after some heavy editing of the text. And cheap production values. They managed to preserve the narrative and the essential ethical and philosophical issues but inevitably the production was a tad one-dimensional, having lost light and shade given by ancillary characters and events. But I'll give 'em 7/10 for trying, especially as the actors submitted themselves to a post-performance question and answer session.
There you go; I'm getting all arty farty already.

'Sent From Your iPhone'

Call me a niggardly old cuss but I get cheesed off when people email me from their iPhone and at the bottom of the message it says "Sent from my iPhone". Well, congratubloodylations mate you've got an iPhone! Do you have to keep telling us this? Do you have a signature for emails from your computer that says 'Sent from my computer'? We know how emails get sent!
It is fairly straightforward to change the 'signature' or not have one at all. Here's how to do it.
Choose “Mail, Contacts, Calendars” > Signature, then type a signature.
You can set iPhone to add a signature—your favorite quote, or your name, title, and phone number, for example—to the bottom of every message you send.

Suggestions: Peace and Love*, Adios Amigos**, Hasta La Vista, Baby***, Bye Bye Baby****
* if you are Ringo Starr, ** if you are The Cisco Kid, *** if you are The Terminator, **** if you are The Bay City Rollers

Rock and Roll Truisms

Entertaining discussion thread over at The Word : What are the things in rock that are clearly obvious to you if not necessarily anyone else? Some examples :-
Bruce Springsteen can't sing or play guitar.
Velvet Underground were crap.
Lots of heavy metal songs are about hell and the devil. Very few are about 16th century metaphysics.
Pete Doherty and Amy Winehouse - over rated and over exposed.
I fail to see the point of Leonard Cohen.
"The only reason you're in this band is because you've got the bloody PA."
There is generally a very good reason why rare and unreleased tracks are rare and unreleased.

Here are my contributions:
1) The readers of music magazines are often more astute than the writers, and can more often spot a load of hyped up baloney when they see it.
2) Very few albums are 100% good. There's usually at least one duff track (e'g Yellow Submarine on Revolver).
3) Just because you can fit 80 minutes of stuff on a CD doesn't mean you have to.
4) It is really depressing that The Daily Telegraph now has a staff rock music 'journalist'.
5) Phil Collins should have stuck to just playing the drums.
6) Keith Richards should be dead by now.
7) George Martin made the difference between The Beatles being a great pop group and The Best Thing That Ever Happened To Music.
8) The world would be a different place if Jimi Hendrix had lived.
9) Electronic drums should be disinvented.
10)The 1980s were generally pretty crap all round - big hair metal, New Romantics, Thatcher, Reagan, synthpop, McCartney's Frog Song. I could go on.

Thursday, 4 February 2010

Wahhhh

Someday, I'm going to go to Hawaii and climb to the top of the Haleakala volcano when the Earth and Mars are closest in their orbits and, coincidentally, there is strong moonlight reflected in the fog, and I'll be able to see this view:


Mars is the bright light in the sky.

(via APOD. See also TWAN)

Peace and Love

Ringo Starr is now sober, has stopped smoking, is vegetarian and he has found God. Although he doesn't say which particular god he's found, we'll assume he's using the term in its generic sense in a kind of Ghandi-like way. He's also got a new album out called 'Y Not'.
Being a Ringo Starr album it's not what you'd call ground-breaking but it is quite snappy and commercial, and it has a positive feel to it. And he's got some top class collaborators in there with him so it's not bad at all. I guess we all have a soft spot for Ringo - I like the way he's never anything but what he is - so I wish him well with it. You can listen to it on Spotify. He'll be 70 years old this year.

Wednesday, 3 February 2010

Blue Heater

Here's a picture of Phil's latest project, now complete - an effects pedal for guitar The Blue Heater. I tried it out today. It provides overdrive and distortion almost like a fuzz box. Quite fruity. The plan is that Phil and his buddy Rohan will make more of these for sale at £75 a piece and they have one firm order so far (!) from the guitar tutor at the school where Phil works. Big trees, mighty acorns and so forth. I am bound to say, however, that it seems to me that Phil has done most of the work whilst Rohan's role has been more 'consultative'. I'll see if we can get them to make a short demonstration video to put on You Tube.
All enquiries to xorgth@gmail.com.

Junk

At this time of year most of our insurance policies (car, building & contents etc) come up for renewal. Somehow or other, this fact has found its way on to several databases and I get bombarded with junk mail offering to sell me ever cheaper insurance and even better service than ever before offered by anyone. All this despite the fact that we've stuck with the same company for some time now because they are reasonably priced and have provided good service. I wonder whether their databases also tell these companies that?
Any road up; today I got junk mail from the AA, Saga, 50 plus (twice), and RIAS. Enough! So I've registered with the Mail Preference Service in the hope that these bothersome nitwits will eventually leave me alone. The idea is that companies sending out mailshots check their list against the MPS list and refrain from sending stuff to those on the MPS list. 
I've already registed with the Telephone Preference Service which has reduced the number of idiot phone calls, but has not unfortunately prevented Kwik Fit from calling me from somewhere in deepest Scotland to offer me something or other in an impenetrable Scottish dialect. At least the chaps in India try to pretend to speak English!
Harumph.
Update:   Next day; just received two more from RIAS. Apparently I could win a Caribbean Cruise and a Mini simply by asking for a quote! And another from AVIVA.

Tuesday, 2 February 2010

February the Second

'Ow Do, Chuck! Today is what Americans call Groundhog Day. Besides being an excellent film what this day is all about is relying on a hibernating rodent to prognosticate on whether or not Spring is on the way. If the groundhog can see its shadow then it goes back into hibernation; if not it stays awake. This is of course a load of balderdash because if Spring is not on the way then the Earth is no longer tilting about its axis and something has gone seriously wrong indeed. February the Second is, not surprisingly, half way between the Winter and Spring solstices. The custom apparently dates back to pre-Christian times when the Celts used to reckon that when badgers were up and about things would be warming up. The Americans seem to have adapted the custom from some European immigrants.
Whatever. When I looked out this morning there were no shadows. It was dull and overcast and drizzling with rain. If I the option had been available to me then I would have gone back into hibernation.
PS. The groundhog is also known as the woodchuck and it remains a matter of some debate how much wood a woodchuck would chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood.

Monday, 1 February 2010

Get Back

Last Saturday was the anniversary of The Beatles' rooftop concert at Apple, 3 Saville Row, London. This was their last live performance; 42 minutes long. The setlist was Get BackDon't Let Me Down, I've Got a Feeling, One After 909, and Dig a Pony. There's more stuff about the concert at this fansite. I actually saw the film of Let It Be back in 1970 or 1971 at the cinema (the Odeon, Middlesbrough) and it was at times quite depressing as you could see and feel the tensions within the group. Paul McCartney was getting on everyone's nerves and everyone resented Yoko hanging around. It's no wonder The Beatles have not wanted the film to be reissued. But despite all that, they still made some good music. Any road up, here I am outside the front door of what used to be Apple HQ, pointing upwards to the roof, several years later.

Sunday, 31 January 2010

The Pound in Your Pocket

Recalling that my parents bought our Geoff's piano for £12 made me wonder how much that would be in today's money so I had a look at This is Money website and according to their inflation calculator £12 would now be £203. That's just over two weeks' Retirement Pension these days.
Whilst there I found this graphic showing comparitive prices over the last 49 years. The most frightening price rise is for fish and chips which has risen by 7,400%. Caramba!

Fire and Piano

It's a cold winter's evening. You're tired. What you need to do is sit by the fire with a glass of whisky and listen to some soothing piano. Here's the fire and piano, bring your own whisky.
(Filmed at Lord Trousers' country retreat in Yorkshire).

Saturday, 30 January 2010

Hotcha!

Phil has finished his refurbishment of my Les Paul and it had its first serious outing today with a band practice. Katanga! - the Di Marzio pick ups are so different. The key is to turn the pick ups up high and the volume down on the amplifier. Fantastic sound. And the new Grover machine heads make tuning so much easier as there's no slack or slippage in the gearing. What's more, the band practice went much better than I feared, given my lack of practice. We got some new songs sorted out quite well, and revived some old ones:
Valerie - The Zutons
My Hero -Foo Fighters
Steady As She Goes - Raconteurs
Stumble and Fall - Razorlight
Can't Stop - Red Hot Chilli Peppers
Warning Sign - Coldplay
Brief attempt at Cochise by Audioslave but very sloppy. Next time!

Liar Liar Pants On Bliar

You should make up your own minds about Tony Blair and his cohorts and the rights and wrongs of the Iraq War. Their statements are on the Iraq Inquiry website. It remains to be seen what conclusions Lord Chilcott draws, and we should remember that this was not a trial, but an exercise intended "to establish, as accurately as possible, what happened and to identify the lessons that can be learned." But I think I have concluded that:
  • It had been American policy to secure regime change in Iraq since at least1998 but Clinton wasn't prepared to go to war. Dubya Bush and his neo-con cronies, however, were all too keen to remove Saddam and were merely waiting for a pretext for military action. The atrocity on September 11 provided that, notwithstanding that there was never any link between Al Qaeeda and Saddam.
  • Blair had said to Bush that he would be stand with him in taking military action for regime change whatever happened, but he wanted to seek approval via the United Nations and his own Parliament. He likes to present himself in a cloak of righteousness. Blair had convinced himself that Saddam was a security risk for 'the West', although there was no evidence that Saddam had the slightest intention of attacking anyone except Iran and the Kurds (and maybe Israel). The Blair machine then set about producing a basis on which to justify an invasion of Iraq.
  • Lord Goldsmith was 'persuaded' to change his view on the legality of military invention without a clear mandate from the United Nations. The Security Council was in a quandary; whilst Iraq might have been in breach on UN resolutions so were other states, such as Israel. So there was never going to be a 'second resolution'.
  • Military planning had begun fairly early in 2002 and once troops and so forth were mobilised and in place, there was no way Blair and Bush were going to pull back.
Essentially, the decision to go to war had been taken early on and the rest was window dressing. Who knows what it is about Blair's psychological make up that made him so determined to stick with Bush and the USA. I don't think this makes Blair a 'war criminal' although it does make him a duplicitous, and self-deluding, bastard. The result has been that far from making the world a safer place, the Iraq War has made it less secure and empowered Al Qaeeda and Iran. Meanwhile, lives and resources have been squandered. What makes it doubly annoying is that there were those who were telling Blair at the time that he'd got it all wrong - but he wouldn't listen. So the lesson to be learned? Be careful who you vote for...you always elect a politician.

Friday, 29 January 2010

Happiness is a Beatles Remaster

I pondered slowly and cautiously about whether or not to buy the latest re-issue of The Beatles' albums - how many times am I going to buy the same stuff? I got them in mono, then stereo then on CD. Hasn't McCartney had enough of my money? Moreover, I tend to listen to music mostly in mp3 format via iPod or PC these days so I queried whether it was worthwhile, given that mp3 loses a fair bit of dynamics and so forth. Eventually, however, I was tempted by a limited edition box set for £28 comprising Rubber Soul, Revolver, Sgt Pepper and Abbey Road and I am glad I took the plunge. Of course, one has to play them on a proper stereo system with proper speakers to get the full benefit but it is wonderful. The remastering has been done exceptionally well - especially the vocals, and the guitars sound so crisp. And you can hear all the little tweaks and extra bits that were previously lost in the mix. So I've gone ahead and got the White Album as well and I'm about to spin it on the groove machine...

Thursday, 28 January 2010

The Carpet Catastrophe

We measured the floor in the auxiliary accommodation as 5m by 2.3m and went to the carpet shop and ordered some carpet accordingly. The fitter turned up today, chirpy chappy, and he set out fitting it, only to discover that the piece of carpet is 3cm too short. Apparently, although you might order carpet in  a 5m width, the manufacturing process means that it can turn out to be plus or minus several cm either way i.e 4.97m or 5.03m. The fitter chappie says that you should order it in 5.10m width - but that would mean it would be 4m the other way incurring a lot of wastage and extra expenditure, which is why the shop had ordered it in 5m width. (You can't get 5.10m by 3m). So, bad luck mate, your bit came out 3cm short. Ho hum. Any road up, the helpful fitter chappie has cut a strip from the side off-cut to fill in the gap (there's 0.7m spare that side), the only problem being that the weave goes in the other direction so, on close inspection, it looks a bit odd. I think we'll be putting the wardrobe or some such at that end of the room!
We live and we learn. Apparently.

Wednesday, 27 January 2010

The Ivories Move On


We said farewell to our old piano today. It has had to make way for Phil's drums, amplifiers, wires, electric piano and so forth. The piano was bought for £12 by my parents second-hand back in 1961 or 1962, as far as I can remember, for my brother Geoff. I think it was bought from or via his piano teacher and he passed it on to the Xorg Collective when he bought himself a nice new one. All three Xorgorinos have since learned to play so thanks, Geoff. The old piano will remain in active service; it has been bought by a chap in Welwyn Garden City whose two young daughters are keen to learn to play. Ah well, another bit of our childhood goes on its way...Meanwhile, here's a piano-related joke:-

A pianist and singer are rehearsing 'Autumn Leaves' for a concert and the pianist says, 'OK. We will start in G minor and then on the third bar, modulate to B major and go into 5/4. When you get to the bridge, modulate back down to F# minor and alternate a 4/4 bar with a 7/4 bar. On the last A section go into double time and slowly modulate back to G minor.'
The singer answers, 'Crikey, I don't think I can remember all of that.'
The pianist replies, 'Well, that's what you did last time.'

The Great Wallpapering Disaster


We are currently refurbishing the auxiliary accommodation area at Xorg HQ. Insulation material has been installed on the walls and ceiling to reduce heat loss and improve soundproofing but they didn't tell us that this material is a bugger to wallpaper. Apparently you are supposed to apply paste to the wall as well as to the paper when, of course, in our naivety we applied paste only to the paper. The result is some seriously unstuck wallpaper. This photo shows the worst example and there are quite a few places where only parts of the paper have stuck leaving raised bumps elsewhere. We are now faced with the decision whether to try and bodge it or scrap it and start again. I think we all know what we ought to do but can't yet face up to it. I don't think duct tape or WD40 is going to be sufficient on this occasion. Ho Hum.
Still, look on the positive side: it's been a learning experience.

Tuesday, 26 January 2010

I Know My Place

The Guardian reports that the Tories are "losing the battle over class" and that one third of voters see the Tories as the party of the upper classes. There is a huge debate to be had over the issue of 'class' in the UK and where the divisions fall. For example, a lot of people consider themselves to be working class socially although their income and standard of living is middle class e.g. a train driver on the London Underground earns £40K a year but would probably say he is working class. And not many people admit to being upper class for fear of being labelled arrogant.
But in any case, David Cameron scored a 'class issue' own goal last week on the subject of teacher training when he showed himself up as a toffee-nosed snob by saying it will be the Tories' policy that teachers should ideally have 'first class' degrees and that candidates with only a third class degree would be denied funding for teacher training. He actually said he wants it to be an elite profession.
What's wrong with this?
First, there is no evidence that having a First, a 2:1 or 2:2 would necessarily make you a better teacher than someone with a third class degree. Being a good teacher requires something more of a person than merely being brainy or good at passing exams. You have to be able to communicate enthusiasm for learning to children from all backgrounds and social classes. Many of us will have had experience of teachers who, although extremely well qualified academically, are just no good at (or couldn't care less about) getting it across to others and inspiring otherwise disinterested children. And yet I've known others without a degree who could get children involved and enthusiastic within minutes. Moreover, there are many good teachers (now approaching retirement) who do not have a degree at all but instead completed a three-year teacher training course - I think it was 1976 when it became a requirement for teachers to have  a degree. Basically, Mr Cameron is missing the point of what makes a good teacher.
Secondly, if you want to employ the 'high-flyers' you're going to have to pay 'high-flyers' wages or else they'll all be off to work for J P Morgan after the first difficult teaching practice. But more more importantly to be a good teacher you have to want to be a teacher and not just interested in money.
Thirdly, Mr Cameron's views imply a criticism of all those unfortunate wretches who have only managed to get a third. This casts a bit of a slur on some otherwise useful members of society such as:
Carol Vorderman - a maths whizz and TV presenter.
Fiona Shackleton - Paul McCartney's divorce lawyer, and solicitor for Princes William and Harry.
Stanley Baldwin - three times Prime Minister (a Tory).
W H Auden - quite good at poetry, and he actually worked as a tutor and schoolmaster for a while. And he was Professor of Poetry at Oxford.
Philip Pullman - successful author, and he was a teacher in Oxford and at Westminster College before that.
It would appear that this is indeed a 'class' issue for Mr Cameron resulting from his own educational experience in independent schools and at Eton, where teachers generally have not been through the usual route for teacher training. Unlike State schools, those in the independent sector require only that teachers have a 'good degree' from a 'good university' (although they no doubt prefer candidates also to have Qualified Teacher Status).
Mr Cameron, of course, does have a First Class degree. It's surprising that someone  apparently so clever should come up with such half-baked ideas.

Monday, 25 January 2010

R L Stevenson Alert

A couple of months ago I was rattling on about my favourite writers, one of whom is Robert Louis Stevenson. I mentioned the Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde - well, if you still haven't got round to reading this story you can go to the BBC iPlayer and listen to Tim Piggot-Smith reading it for you. Highly recommended. Hurry up - it won't be there for much longer. Only 11 hours, in fact, before Episode 1 vanishes from the ether.

Sunday, 24 January 2010

Beaucoup de Retours Heureux

Yesterday was the 100th anniversary of the birth of Django Reinhardt. Innovative, unorthodox, and supremely talented. Something about his music just makes a chap feel better. All his stuff is now out of copyright so you can get any number of anthologies, box sets or whatever quite cheap.
 More at all about jazz.

Jeff Beck is Rather Good.

Jeff Beck with Jimmy Page on 'rhythm' guitar. Mr Page gets the prize for obscure guitar - a Fender electric 12-string. Jeff Beck is playing the Albert Hall in October, and meanwhile with Eric Clapton  at the O2 next month.

Friday, 22 January 2010

Tell Me About It, Glenys!

Baroness Kinnock, Minister of State, complained yesterday that the Foreign Office is facing a £110 million budget shortfall as a result of currency fluctuations i.e. the value of the pound has fallen against other currencies. It used to be that The Treasury protected the Foreign Office against this difficulty because most of the Foreign Office's expenditure is overseas and they were thus vulnerable to currency fluctuations, making long-term financial planning a tad tricky. But The Treasury have recently gone all hard-headed and mollycoddle them no more.
When El Presidente and I began the planning process for our building project in Cyprus, the pound was worth 20% more against the Euro than it is now. So I know how you feel Glenys; we're having to find more money than originally budgeted and we've cut back on our plans! Of course, what makes it doubly difficult to stomach is that it is mostly the Treasury's ineptitude that has caused the fall in the value of the pound. Moreover, if they hadn't been so paranoid about the Euro and had joined the Eurozone when we should have, there wouldn't be a problem!
When I worked for the Government, we used to have a phrase that kept cropping up - 'The Dead Hand of the Treasury'. No change there, then.

Thursday, 21 January 2010

Putting the Heat on Tony Blair


The campaign group 38 Degrees is seeking support for some really strenuous and searching questioning of Tony Blair when he appears before the Chilcot Irag Inquiry. It seems unlikely that Blair will cave in and admit he got it all wrong and that he lied to us, but they want to make sure that he at least has a tough ride and is made to squirm. If you agree then you can sign up and add your suggested question for Blair.
Background: As far as I know, 38 Degrees is not a front for the Soviet Union, or a devious  double-bluff plot by MI5 to get the names of people who might think differently from The Powers That Be. They comprise the usual left-leaning types such as Greenpeace, The Big Issue, Reprieve, Amnesty International and The Body Shop and so forth. No party political affiliation. But any road up, I approve of any effort to make life less comfortable for Mr Blair.

Romantic Uke

(from Daze of Our Lives)




Tchaikovsky's early works for the ukulele were stupidly lost in 1878 during a poker game in Vienna.

Wednesday, 20 January 2010

Well. That's Cleared That Up!

(from All About Jazz, by Steve Chalke.)
Interviewer: What do you expect is in store for the future of jazz trumpet?
Yogi: I'm thinkin' there'll be a group of guys who've never met talkin' about it all the time...
Interviewer: Can you explain jazz?
Yogi: I can't, but I will. 90% of all jazz is half improvisation. The other half is the part people play while others are playing something they never played with anyone who played that part. So if you play the wrong part, it's right. If you play the right part, it might be right if you play it wrong enough. But if you play it too right, it's wrong.
Interviewer: I don't understand.
Yogi: Anyone who understands jazz knows that you can't understand it. It's too complicated. That's what's so simple about it.
Interviewer: Do you understand it?
Yogi: No. That's why I can explain it. If I understood it, I wouldnt know anything about it.
Interviewer: Are there any great jazz players alive today?
Yogi: No. All the great jazz players alive today are dead. Except for the ones that are still alive. But so many of them are dead, that the ones that are still alive are dying to be like the ones that are dead. Some would kill for it.
Interviewer: What is syncopation?
Yogi: That's when the note that you should hear now happens either before or after you hear it. In jazz, you don't hear notes when they happen because that would be some other type of music. Other types of music can be jazz, but only if they're the same as something different from those other kinds.
Interviewer: Now I really don't understand.
Yogi: I haven't taught you enough for you to not understand jazz that well.

Schadenfreude vol.3: That's No Way To Run A Battleship

Manchester United's owners are £716.5 million in debt, which is secured against the club. The club made a profit last year of £6.4 million, thanks only to the £80 million they got for the sale of Fancypants Ronaldo - the previous year they made a loss of £47 million, despite winning the Champions League and the Premier League. They paid £68.5 million in interest on their debts last year...! It beggars belief that a business can be run in this way, but there you go - the financial world is a rule unto itself. But maybe we can now see the real reason Sir Alex didn't want to pay for Mr Tevez to stay.

Fzzzzt.


Here's the boy genius working on his next project: an effects pedal, guitarists for the use of. It's going to be a kind of overdrive thingy.  Phil is doing this in partnership with another guitarist chappie called Rohan who, whilst he's nifty on the fingerboard, is useless with a soldering iron. The components were bought as a kit from somewhere in Germany and unfortunately the instructions are only online, and in German. So there's been a bit of head scratching. There's a lot to be said for iterative trial and error as a learning process.

Schadenfreude vol.2: Carlos v. Gary

Nice to see Gary Neville up to his usual childish behaviour following Carlos Tevez's emphatic two-goal response to Neville's endorsement of Sir Alex's view that Carlos wasn't worth the £25 million asking price. Given Mr Neville's track record in this regard, I expect the FA will be asking him to explain himself. You'd think he'd realise that there'd be photographers watching and waiting to catch him out. It'll be a tense second leg next week...maybe Manchester City will buy a new defence in the meantime. No doubt they'll be sending a couple of hefty bodyguards round to accompany Mr Tevez wherever he goes for the next week or so.

Les Paul Renovation Sitrep Update Scenario



The new Di Marzio pickups are in and working, but further remedial work has been necessary on the nut in order to lower the action. Meanwhile, the machine heads are to be replaced - one has split completely and another is cracked. So we've got some 'Grover' replacements on order. It's taking a while, but looking good! I'll have to learn to play it properly now...

I Want One!

NASA is disposing of its retired space shuttles. A snip at $28.8 million.

Tuesday, 19 January 2010

Το κτήριο έχει αρχίσει!

After several years of back and forth and here and there, work on our building project in Cyprus is finally under way. (See previous posts). The Building Licence came through from the Larnaca Municipality (thanks to El Presidente's cousin), and after much chivvying the architect got three different quotes from builders and we've taken the plunge. We decided after all to employ Uncle Hambis' friend who we met on our last visit. He's been dead keen to get the job, phoning the architect and El Presidente at frequent intervals, and eventually cutting his price. So now it's down to the architect to supervise the work in our absence and to authorise the staged payments - this is where he earns his percentage.
The architect reported to us in the first week that he thought the builder might be cutting corners so El Presidente phoned the builder and gently reminded him that we were counting on him, but she also phoned her mother, who phoned Uncle Hambis, who told the builder to watch it or else his sister would be on the blower non-stop and life might get tiresome. We will be making a short visit to Cyprus next month to choose the tiles and bathroom suite etc so we'll see what we shall see. Being optimistic, the work should be finished by the end of May.

Fab Photos

Another works outing for the Xorg Collective last Friday, to The National Portrait Gallery to see the photographic exhibition Beatles to Bowie. Fascinating stuff, featuring some well known pictures of all your poptastic favourites from the Sixties as well as some forgotten gems. The exhibition focuses on British artistes from 1960 to 1969, so it starts off with Cliff and the Shadows, Johnny Kidd and Helen Shapiro and passes through The Beatles, The Stones, The Kinks and many more. It's interesting to note how, despite his continued commercial success, Cliff Richard vanishes from the exhibition after 1963 - no longer cool. Some of the photos can be seen on the website; Google the photographers for loads more examples. Gered Mankowitz, Robert Whitaker, Fiona Adams, Brian Duffy, Angus McBean, Robert Freeman, David Bailey.
There seems to be a convention for photos of pop stars to have studio shots with a plain background which is leftover from the previous era. But with the arrival of The Beatles, photographers became more innovative - I believe this is because people like The Beatles, The Stones, and Hendrix had an effect on the photographer and gave them a boost of creative inspiration. Another factor was that the photographers were (mostly) of the same generation as their subjects, identified with them, and were wanting to do something different as per the spirit of the times.
The exhibition also features some artefacts from the Sixties - LP covers, magazines, concert tickets and the like. Groovy.

Friday, 15 January 2010

NYJO Nearly Broke

Alarming news via the Evening Standard. The National Youth Jazz Orchestra (NYJO) needs to raise £105K by April, or face financial ruin. This is apparently part of the knock-on effect from the cancellation of the annual National Association of Youth Orchestras festival, which has a shortfall of £50K. Winding up NYJO would be a great tragedy as it provides a tremendous training ground for young musicians. To help them out you could book them to play at your wedding, bar mitzvah or whatever. Or if you are a rich businessman you could sponsor them. If you are an employee of Goldman Sachs you could just give them a bit of your bonus.
Further Thought: £100K is 1% of the amount being spent on the war in Afghanistan per day. Maybe we can persuade Her Majesty's Government to divert some funds!

Dancin' Fool

(via Kill Ugly Radio )
This has to be one of the best ever cover versions of a Frank Zappa song.

Wednesday, 13 January 2010

Schadenfreude

It seems appropriate somehow that the Germans have a special word, schadenfreude,  describing the pleasure we take in the misfortune of others. Not that the Germans are the only people who enjoy such things. And of course we enjoy even more the misfortunes of those who usually get everything right and have a high opinion of themselves.
Manchester City (and others) will be cackling over Alex Ferguson's current unease at the lack of goals his team are scoring whilst Carlos Tevez is knocking them in like billyo for Manchester City - 15 goals so far this season, equalling his total for the whole of last season. Sir Alex reckoned he wasn't worth the £25 million asking price. Ronaldo, whom Sir Alex presumably thought was worth the £80 milliion Real Madrid paid for him, meanwhile has scored 13 goals. And Dimitar Berbatov whom Sir Alex bought for £23.4 million has scored 6. Presumably, Sir Alex blames the refereee.

Tuesday, 12 January 2010

Clothing Fibre Re-alignment Sitrep Update


I am pleased to announce that I have finished the ironing, a process whereby heat and water loosen the long-chain molecular bonds within polymer fibres thus allowing them to be straightened by the application of pressure. And, as if by magic, they retain their shape as they cool. Re-orientating the fibres has no practical value as far as I can tell but it gives a more aesthetically pleasing outcome if applied after washing.

Any Road Up

The Larnaca Municipality has been digging up the roads in the town centre for some time now. It seems like about 103 years and, typically for Cyprus, they never seem to finish. All the work is carried out by the same contractors Iacovou Brothers, whom I suspect must be related in some way to the Mayor and/or officials in the contracts department. Here's just some of the works under way in 2009. As I often say about Cyprus: "It'll be nice when it's finished..."

Sunday, 10 January 2010

Dale Winton in Credibility Shortfall


I generally listen to Pick of the Pops on BBC Radio 2, hosted by the estimable Dale Winton. This week he played stuff from the charts of 1965, including 'Little Red Rooster' by The Rolling Stones - a splendid recording. However, Dale went on to refer to this as a Sam Cooke song. Ahem - enny fule no that it was written by Willie Dixon and definitively recorded by Howlin' Wolf. Mr Cooke covered it the year before the Stones; they referred back to Messrs Wolf and Dixon rather than Mr Cooke's more 'soulified' version. So, Dale, despite your entertaining orange skin and camp delivery, I'm afraid you have just lost all credibility as far as I am concerned. This just won't do.

Friday, 8 January 2010

Viva Ukulele!

Three cheers for the English Martyrs school in Litherland, Liverpool which now has its own Ukulele Orchestra. I understand Year 4 will be learning a new chord very soon. (I have no information on who the mysterious 'Mr Dinsdale', credited with these videos, might be.)
The ukulele can only bring happiness wherever and whenever it appears. Teaching children how to play will undoubtedly make the world a better place, leading to peace and prosperity for all. The ukulele will facilitate a proactive recontextualization of the in-school experience to drive a tringulation of  real-world objectives - Life, the Universe and Everything -  thereby achieving a convergence of meta-cognitive functionalities and competencies unleashing synergistic child-centred real-time development. This is the way forward and I urge all educationalists to brush aside their obsessions with SATS, league tables, curricula, and assessment-driven pedagoguish paradigms and to envision one simple, holistic outcome-based mission statement: To Play the Ukulele!

Elvis Quacks


You like Elvis and you take a bath from time to time. What you need is an Elvis Rubber Duck!
As far as I know, it neither sings nor quacks. But maybe you can do your own singing in the bath. Uh huh huh, uh huh huh. Oh yeah, I'm all quacked up.

Wednesday, 6 January 2010

Epiphany

Typical. You wait all this time for A Wise Man and three turn up at once.

Tuesday, 5 January 2010

Anyone Can Change Their Mind

As reported in The Independent:
David Cameron insisted today that the Tories were "the party of the NHS" as he claimed that health service spending was safe only with them. Mr Cameron said the first section of the Tories' manifesto confirmed the party's commitment to protecting the NHS budget in real terms. "It was our number one priority four years ago when I became leader of the Conservative Party - and has remained so ever since," he said. "It's only three letters long but in it lies the hopes of millions in our country - the NHS.
Somewhat of a contrast to the Conservative Party's attitude towards the foundation of the NHS, back in 1946, as described by Patricia Hewitt MP in a speech to the Fabian Society:
"The Tories opposed his (Aneurin Bevan, the Labour Health Secretary) plan tooth and nail. The Tories' health spokesperson Henry Willink warned the House of Commons that the NHS 'will destroy so much in this country that we value'. The Tories voted against it in Parliament no fewer than 51 times. Once might be a miscalculation, but 51 shows a degree of determination!"

Now That I Have Humility I Have Everything

The sayings of the cranially endowed Cristiano Ronaldo: 
"It's true lots of people hate me but there are even more who love me and who support me. I feel bad only when I play badly. Fortunately that happens rarely."
"It is the best I have scored. It was a fantastic strike and I can't wait to see it again on DVD."
"The great players cost a lot of money, and if you want them you have to pay it. I'm happy to be the most expensive player in the world."
"I'm going to win the Ballon d'Or back, this year or next. I have an ambition to become the best player in history."
It was a lively match for Cristiano: he missed a penalty, failed to celebrate when Benzema netted the rebound, scored another himself and finally ended up being dismissed towards the end of the encounter (second yellow card for kicking Ortiz).  Cristiano stated, "I am a human being, and I can also make mistakes. It was an instinctive reaction, and I have already apologized to my team-mates. I am a perfectionist, but the good thing is that Karim scored."

Saturday, 2 January 2010

Why Am I Not Surprised?

The judge in the trial of the Blackwater employees who shot 17 Iraqis has dismissed all charges against the defendants on the grounds that they had been told that what they said in their initial interviews would not be used against them, but this has nevertheless been included in the prosecution's evidence. Notwithstanding that one of the defendants pleaded guilty and was to testify against his former colleagues, and that there are other witnesses prepared to give similar evidence. So, the Blackwater guys are guilty but they get off on a technicality. Another example of 'the Law' not providing justice, which will lead to disillusionment and to other people taking the law into their own hands. And it won't hurt Al Qaeda's  recruitment activities.

Elvis Lives


This week marks the date when Elvis Presley would have been 75 had he not slowly committed suicide in Las Vegas. There will be a flurry of 'specials' on TV & Radio and the press which I fear will tend to focus on the jumpsuit era when the cognoscenti know that he did nothing worthwhile after 1962. With maybe one or two exceptions, everything after he came out of the army was total crap with a capital K. Meanwhile, the Elvis Industry will be offering endless piles of rubbish 'collectibles' and I'm keeping an eye out for the most tacky and yecch-inducing item to appear. So far, in amongst the keychains, clocks, plates, hot water bottles and barbecue aprons, this item is in the lead. I don't know why, but the fact that it emanates from Bradford gives it that extra wha?.. quotient.

Friday, 1 January 2010

...You Caught Me Standing Alone

Not only was it New Year's Eve last night but it was also a blue moon. Defined in Wikepedia as follows:
A blue moon is a full moon that is not timed to the regular monthly pattern. Most years have twelve full moons which occur approximately monthly, but in addition to those twelve full lunar cycles, each solar calendar year contains an excess of roughly eleven days compared to the lunar year. The extra days accumulate, so that every two or three years (7 times in the 19-year Metonic Cycle), there is an extra full moon. The extra moon is called a "blue moon." Different definitions place the "extra" moon at different times. The term blue moon was coined in 1933.
Blue Moon is a track on Elvis Presley's first album.
Until the arrival of Carlos Tevez, the frequency of a blue moon coincided with a goal being scored by Manchester City.

Previously...